Stuffiness is the enemy.
My first experience of religion came from the semi-rural Church of England. Living on the outskirts of Norwich, over in Norfolk (the original one, not the American knock-off), I was invited to go to the beautiful-but-musty-smelling old Norman village church to worship. The impression of English stuffiness combined with the realities of middle-class hypocrisy to leave me feeling that “real” religion didn’t exist in churches.
Today I still hold that same view: churches are, on the whole, the last places to go if you want to experience a genuine, living Christian faith. I can’t help wondering if followers of other faiths have similar feelings about their own organised religious places.
For me, stuffiness is the enemy. It’s that sense of expectation towards doing “what you should”.
Whatever “should” means.
And it’s not just British reserve either. I’ve experienced the American brand of stuffiness too – it might be more smiley and relaxed, but it’s still all about vague expectations of “what you should” be doing. Bleh!
What happened to authenticity?
One of my best friends at school lived in a Christian household and had an Anglican Priest for a father. As in Dad, not so much as in “Forgive me Father…”
Anyway… when we hit mid-teens my friend’s Dad finally “came out” about the affair he’d been having with another woman. This priest divorced his wife, left his kids, and moved to another parish. But that was ok, it seemed.
It was natural, they said… nobody REALLY expected a priest to obey what was taught in the Christian scriptures.
Hmm.
As a young man, still finding my spiritual feet, I can remember what I thought of that. It was a catalyst for me to move away from churchy folk and stuff. I got a job at McDonald’s instead… and started to look elsewhere for spiritual truth.
I come back to my question: “What happened to authenticity?”
Certainly this priest had been authentic in terms of his own experience – and I don’t necessarily wish to sit here and disapprove of his decision.
Yet, importantly, he also betrayed his position as an authentic representative of the Christian Gospel. He chose, in essence, to choose his own desires over the calling he previously claimed to have been following from Above.
That was the moment that I started to realise that the local church had very few authentic Christians in it.
Why should you care?
Perhaps it’s time to ask ourselves what religion is all about.
Is it some nice and warm blanket to wrap around ourselves when we feel cold from the world’s harshness? Or is it something greater? Something more?
If there really is something greater than all of us “out there” then surely we owe it to ourselves to discover it?
I am convinced that this quest for understanding and meaning is what drives scientists and theologians alike to seek answers. And it’s not a quest that’s limited to an educated minority – it’s your birth-right and responsibility.
Take hold of your faith.
Right now some 87% of the people in the world are seeking to live out a faith through religious experience.
Each person has a choice to make: do you live out an authentic faith… or do you live out what everyone else expects of you?
You cannot sit on the fence when it comes to faith. Every religion, every belief system of value, challenges its followers and adherents to live differently. For people of all faiths, cherry-picking the convenient stuff is not an authentic expression of your tradition.
You don’t have to be militant. The choice you make is yours… and expecting others to follow your own beliefs is the equivalent of laying a mighty big “should” onto everyone else you meet. Don’t do it: show, don’t tell. If your life is authentic, and worth following, then others will ask you about it too.
You can’t con folk with your high values. Remember the old wisdom: “I can’t hear what you’re saying because what you are screams so loudly.” – your actions will far outweigh your words. Stop trying to con both yourself and others by talking about your great moral and personal values. Just live them… and then folk will know who you are.
In the end, if you let go of the “should” of faith then you stand a far better chance of gaining the truth than flows from an authentic life.
Who’s whispering “should” in your ear?